I'm trapped in my mind
and my brain is a cell.
But I have a key,
It's called insanity,
I grace it with my brain
and unlock eternity
So I am in the midst of a terrible enviorment, my connections are broken and split from a series of cause-effect events. I do not believe I have done anything too wreckless to have caused this, but as usual, I am confronted with chronic bullshit. As though fate was fighting me, as though father time wanted my death, I feel as though the natural occurrence of things have been terribly unlikely and should I believe in an omnipotent force would make me very angry with the gods. Oh well, I have accepted all terrible events for what they are -- part of my life. I should not expect anything to remain stable anymore. I just must take care of my simple necessary interests and loosely hold onto the people and material wants around me.
In the past I have tried learning, justifying, and persuading myself to be outwardly violent. I have created a very impressive vessel, yet I slowly destroy it with every devastating blow to my mind. I no longer wish to be victim to my power, I want victims around me. I am dangerous, I look dangerous, I am just my only prey; I am a danger to myself. I should think that to ever understand the joy and power of outward expression, I should need to force it upon my self. I believe Lord Henry said it best:
Lord Henry "There is no such thing as a good influence, Mr. Gray. All influence is immoral.immoral from the
scientific point of view."
Dorian Gray "Why?"
Lord Henry "Because to influence a person is to give him one's own soul. He does not think his natural thoughts, or burn with his natural passions. His virtues are not real to him. His sins, if there are such things as sins, are borrowed. He becomes an echo of some one else's music, an actor of a part that has not been written for him. The aim of life is self-development. To realize one's nature perfectly. that is what each of us is here for. People are afraid of themselves, nowadays. They have forgotten the highest of all duties, the duty that one owes to one's self. Of course, they are charitable. They feed the hungry and clothe the beggar. But their own souls starve, and are naked. Courage has gone out of our race. Perhaps we never really had it. The terror of society, which is the basis of morals, the terror of God, which is the secret of religion.these are the two things that govern us. And yet."
and my brain is a cell.
But I have a key,
It's called insanity,
I grace it with my brain
and unlock eternity
So I am in the midst of a terrible enviorment, my connections are broken and split from a series of cause-effect events. I do not believe I have done anything too wreckless to have caused this, but as usual, I am confronted with chronic bullshit. As though fate was fighting me, as though father time wanted my death, I feel as though the natural occurrence of things have been terribly unlikely and should I believe in an omnipotent force would make me very angry with the gods. Oh well, I have accepted all terrible events for what they are -- part of my life. I should not expect anything to remain stable anymore. I just must take care of my simple necessary interests and loosely hold onto the people and material wants around me.
In the past I have tried learning, justifying, and persuading myself to be outwardly violent. I have created a very impressive vessel, yet I slowly destroy it with every devastating blow to my mind. I no longer wish to be victim to my power, I want victims around me. I am dangerous, I look dangerous, I am just my only prey; I am a danger to myself. I should think that to ever understand the joy and power of outward expression, I should need to force it upon my self. I believe Lord Henry said it best:
Lord Henry "There is no such thing as a good influence, Mr. Gray. All influence is immoral.immoral from the
scientific point of view."
Dorian Gray "Why?"
Lord Henry "Because to influence a person is to give him one's own soul. He does not think his natural thoughts, or burn with his natural passions. His virtues are not real to him. His sins, if there are such things as sins, are borrowed. He becomes an echo of some one else's music, an actor of a part that has not been written for him. The aim of life is self-development. To realize one's nature perfectly. that is what each of us is here for. People are afraid of themselves, nowadays. They have forgotten the highest of all duties, the duty that one owes to one's self. Of course, they are charitable. They feed the hungry and clothe the beggar. But their own souls starve, and are naked. Courage has gone out of our race. Perhaps we never really had it. The terror of society, which is the basis of morals, the terror of God, which is the secret of religion.these are the two things that govern us. And yet."
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